I came out of the guesthouse with my rucksack and list of jobs from Sue, go to immigration to sort out the visa extension, check the currency we need for Laos, get some more showergel (my head was spinning) and walked over to the bike. Huh? no bike. There was a space and if there had been a cream cake dessert in it I would have looked inside. "That's funny, it was here last night". I walked around looking outside the massage place and the coffee shop, in case I had left it there and walked home by accident (those of you who know me will realise that that was not as stupid an idea as it sounds). Finally I had to admit to myself that it had been stolen, so off I trudged to the shop to break the news (our liability was 40, 000 baht!). At any one time I should say that a conservative estimate of the number of motorbikes like mine would be about 100,000 so the chances of it being found were surely zero.
"Ah, Mr Mark, you lucky man, the police came round to say they had stopped 2 people on your bike and it is at the police station"! Unbelievable! I am beginning to think that the Jackson luck is a real phenomenon that could do with some serious scientific study. I spent the day being ferried around between 2 police stations and the shop the son of the owner. They didn't actually talk to me but there was lots of pointing and 'ferang''s flying about (their word for foreigner). It cost me 1400 baht. 400 to replace the number plate (That's why they stopped them, the idiots removed it when they stole it!!) and crash helmet and 1000 to the guy who ferried me here there and everywhere. I was due to pay another thousand as a 'thankyou/ bribe' to the policeman when I collected the bike but even after a whole day they
wouldn't let us have it.
Which reminds me of another story. A guy in the Internet cafe had his credit card stolen by someone he thought was a friend. he then got a phone call from a night club in Bagkok to say they had been presented with his card that night and when it was refused the guy who used it ran off and could they please have the 6000 baht for the bill! When he pointed out that he was in Chiang Mai and the card was stolen so he wasn't going to pay, they described the man (a one armed black Japanese guy) he realised it was his friend that had stolen the card (although how he knew from that description I don't know). Guess what, the guy turned up again in Bangkok. What would
you have done at that point....
a) Go to the police, or
b) Tell him that the police would ask for a massive bribe, so if he gave you
15 000 baht you would forget all about it?
I had heard about bribing the police but now I know it is true.
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